My Son In Law was right: I AM old and forgetful!

•September 23, 2012 • Leave a Comment

While describing my concerns to my husband about the missing birthday candle holders, I pointed my finger towards the utility room, while my mouth was speaking about the bedroom. I paused. Why were my fingers pointing to the utility room? I paused again. I got up, opened the utility room door, and stared directly at the black and white striped box holding the beloved birthday candle holders.

Well, I’ll be damned. I am old and forgetful.


My how time flies…

•September 23, 2012 • 1 Comment

Has it really been three months since I’ve posted anything? Between the new job and the new grandson, I guess I haven’t taken the time to write. Not even to write about my grandson? What kinda grandmother am I?

So, OK, let’s talk about my grandson.

First, he’s beautiful. He’s got big soulful eyes that look like they’re already filled with wisdom. (Yeah, yeah, I know I’m sorta anthropomorphizing him!) He’s cautious and studied in his approach to people and things. He startles easily. He can freak out some. But, oh my goodness, when he laughs there’s not a cell in his body that isn’t laughing. He loves the sound of his voice, and likes music and being sung to. He babbles a lot, screeches and giggles. He’s high maintenance, but so much fun to be with that it makes the tough times easier. And, yes, I’m prejudiced. As it should be.

Is my daughter sleep-deprived? Yes. Is she tired? Yes. Does her husband help out? Absolutely. But a high maintenance baby takes everything out of everyone, with not much left in the reserve tanks. When my husband and I babysat on location with Wesley while his mom was doing a wedding shoot, I took a nap when he did. And that’s not saying a whole lot, because he doesn’t nap a whole lot. Twenty minutes, tops. Maybe a few times a day. No morning nap. No afternoon nap. Just little catnaps. My poor daughter and son in law. What a way to be newbie parents.

Wesley likes to be entertained, and he can entertain himself. He loves lying on his back and playing with a bunch of dangling toys hanging from a PVC set-up. He’s found his toes, another source of wonder and delight. He likes being in the stroller, even inside the house, so he can see what’s going on. Don’t cuddle him, though (unless he’s trying to sleep). If you’re holding him, you’d better be letting him see the world over your shoulder or he’s not a happy camper.

He has some bouncy 360 degree chair thingy that has sounds and lights and gadgets and toys. He loves that, too.

But everything in moderation. And in short intervals. My daughter spends her day moving from one activity to the other. And meal time is still serious business, but now he can get easily distracted. So I can’t play with his toes while he’s nursing, or he stops. Oops! My bad!

My daughter was sick this week, but luckily only a 24-hour bug. She ran a high fever.  Her father-in-law was in town, and he kindly drove her to the doctor. Yep, a virus. Sorry, nothing we can do for you. But the baby should be fine because he’s nursing. Now go home. Get well soon.


But she recovered quickly. And now she’s panicking because she can’t find the precious birthday candle holders we used for HER birthdays. Right now, it’s he said, she said. I think I gave them to her since Wesley was born, she and her husband say I’m old and forgetful so I probably still have them! I think I took them down and the box got shoved into a corner because the baby was new, nursing was new, not sleeping was new, etc. They’ll turn up in time for his first birthday. But my daughter wants them NOW to decorate his room. Where oh where can those candle holders be? Under other circumstances, I know my daughter and I would have unwrapped each one to look at, to ooh and aaah over. But I have a sense of feeling disappointment that we didn’t get to do that because there was so much other stuff going on. My sense of feeling disappointment, and my memory (poor as it is) of taking the candle holders down once Wesley was born, plus the fact I can’t find them at home, all seems to point to the ineluctable conclusion that they are in my daughter’s house somewhere. Like I said, they’ll turn up.

And I promise, I’ll turn up more frequently here to post.

Morning Person Again?

•June 30, 2012 • 1 Comment

Summer has turned into a blistering high heat high humidity nightmare. Temperatures soaring into the upper 90’s and low 100’s, with heat indexes at 110 are here for a number of days. It takes your breath away when you walk outside to do even the most simple task. My solution: stay inside! That’s what air conditioning was created for. This morning, Sonny and I walked around the block at 6 am, then I dropped her off for her breakfast and walked another 30 minutes. That’s it for the day. Last night at 10:45 it still felt hot and humid, but this morning was pleasant enough.

I remember being a morning person when our daughter was young. I would wake up between 5:30 and 6, and enjoy 30 minutes of solitude with my coffee and newspaper. No husband, no daughter. Just time to myself. It’s getting so hot right now I may have to do that again, although the thought of waking up at 5 to walk sounds horrible.

My new job, which I love, has lengthened my days. The other night, I ate dinner and went to lie down for a bit at 7:30. That turned out to be all night. Last night, I did the same thing on purpose.But I woke up feeling refreshed. Well, after 10 hours of sleep, wouldn’t anyone?

I think it’s just my brain is rocketing at light speed right now with my new job. Not that it has caused me any stress: the company is letting me settle in at my own pace, so to speak. But I can’t turn off my brain, even on the leisurely 35 minute drive home. So I come home, immediately change clothes, fix/eat dinner, and crash. Hopefully, this scenario won’t last much longer. I’m sure my husband would appreciate spending some time with me!

My old company found my “replacement”, so I’m helping train her today and over the next few Saturdays. Maybe even the 4th of July if she’s interested. It’s a paid holiday for me, but not for her. The sooner I can cut ties with the old  company — not the people — the better off I’ll feel. And I also spoke with the Guradian ad litem office. My attendance at court is not mandatory, so I can hold on to the two cases I currently have until they’re complete. Then I may switch to the county in which I work, so that court attendance isn’t an issue.

My new office is down towards the end of the “mezzanine” hall, and it’s a little warm, so I had to hijack my fan from my old job the other morning. Then, I discovered that my new car said I had enough gas to make it to my new job, but not to get back home again. Luckily, Kinston has lower gas prices than Greenville as a rule, and I was able to gas up for only a penny more than what Sam’s Club was. And I still made it to work with time to spare.

I hate rushing in the mornings.

My dear husband had the audacity to ask to borrow my new car this weekend for his trip to the western part of the state. How could I say no: he was the one who suggested I get a new car in the first place! So now, we both have more gas efficient cars and I don’t have to shift gears anymore! I’m saving money on mpg, which is good since I’m now a commuter. I love my new car, and already tested its road-worthiness with my most recent trip to see the new grandbaby.

So here I am, on a Saturday morning, blogging prior to 8 am, having already walked, showered, dressed and drunk my coffee. Morning person indeed!

I’m scheduled to meet my replacement at 9, then run to pick up a few things at this store and that, if the heat doesn’t drive that idea right out the window.

Nose to Nose

•June 24, 2012 • 1 Comment

Nose to Nose

Wesley and his furry brother, Captain Sig.

Three visits in 6 weeks!

•June 24, 2012 • Leave a Comment

Due to circumstances totally within my control, I was able to finagle another visit to Wesley for 3 days. I wouldn’t have passed it up for the world!

I’ve been fortunate to see him smile, be happy, be gassy, cry his little heart out, and almost laugh. He’s starting to make sounds, and watch watch watch one’s face. The eye contact with Wesley’s still baby blues is unbelievablly and totally engrossing. Who would think that staring into my grandson’s eyes would send me soaring!

I sing to him, and he listens. I talk to him, and he listens. We have a word for the day, to expand his vocabulary. As if!

And, he can now turn his head and track who he’s looking at, mostly his mama. All eyes are on her and her voice, her touch and her smell. Wesley knows mama is the fount of all he needs, especially when he’s fussy. Mama has learned to recognize the different cries he makes to help her meet his needs better. And I just love watching her watching him, and visa versa. There’s nothing like the look of a mother’s love for her child. My daughter has it in her eyes, her voice, the way she moves around him, the silly sounds she makes, the little games she plays with him.

And I couldn’t be more proud of the new role she’s taken on. She’s a natural, with the help of the internet, lactation specialists, and her gut. Nana’s “knowledge” is outdated, except when it comes to how to love a grandson. I needed no training or practice. I absolutely unconditionally love that little guy, just because he’s the son of my daughter and son-in-law. Families are dysfunctional, but they’re very dynamic, too. And Wesley is the first in our family of the next generation.

And, with no apologies for my bias, Wesley looks absolutely adorable, beautiful, cute, sweet and I’m sure is brilliant besides. He has a great future, but not in football per mama and dad’s specifications. No football: too dangerous. He’s already being groomed for baseball, probably with the South Carolina Gamecocks! But he also has a very artistic mother, so he’ll be well-balanced with his daddy’s mathematics, statistical, and analytical expertise.

In other words, Wesley’s future is bright with potential.

And he really loves a dry clean diaper, and looks so doggone cute in his re-usable diapers.

Don’t grow too fast, Wesley. Not that we have any control over your abilities. But let all of us get to enjoy your babyhood.

I saw him at birth, at two weeks, and at 5 weeks. Next visit: he’ll already be 3 and a half months old! Thank goodness for video chat, daily iPhone pictures from my daughter, and texting. At least Pops and Nana won’t be living in a Wesley void/vacuum.

See you again soon, Wesley!



Wesley Cape’s hands, age two weeks

•May 29, 2012 • Leave a Comment

My Week With Wesley

•May 24, 2012 • Leave a Comment

FishFace Fusspants. That about sums up what his mother calls Wesley Cape in the most loving voice imaginable. Fusspants? Well, that’s obvious if you have to wear diapers. Fish Face? That’s when he puckers up his lips and squishes his cheeks in. Adorable? Absolutely.

And I love hearing my daughter tell Wesley: “Oh, sadness!.” She says it so cooingly (yes, I think I just made up a word), so lovingly, that it touches my heart to hear her talk to her son. I’m drinking it all in, to save in my memories of my second visit with my brand-new grandson.

A week of oohing and aahing over every cute thing Wesley does: every burp, every fart, every little sneeze, every raised eyebrow, every furrowed brow, and every cry. Yes, and even every dirty diaper. They are all ingrained in my heart and soul, to hold on to when I have to leave in just a few days.

I know we’re seeing him over Labor Day. But that’ s practically a lifetime for a newborn. All the milestones we’ll have missed because of the distance between us. His smiling, his cooing, his lifting his head and learning to turn over.

Yes, we can video chat, but it’s no substitute for the real thing. And yet, as soon as my daughter gets her’s and Wesley’s rhythms synced so there’s time for the outside world, then video chatting will do just fine.

And I know I’ll be texted plenty of pictures to keep me visually satisfied.

I just hate being so far away that Wesley won’t “know” us; that we’ll have to count ourselves lucky if we manage to see him only 4 times a year. But stop, Heather. Stop that negativity. Stop thinking only of yourself.

After all, this adventure isn’t mine, after all, but my daughter’s and her husband’s. We’re just one of the sideshows, Pops and Nana. The main attraction, starring Wesley Cape, is just down the road a bit. And for now, that’s better than the other coast or across the ocean. Or no road at all.